Much more for the touch of your whips dear…

One…

Two…

Three…

And now Trump’s pal says bad things that are stupid.

Hedge fund billionaire and Trump pal Tom Barrack wangled a few column inches at CNN.com to tell America please give The Leader a break. Here’s the gist: Dontcha remember that Ronald Reagan fella? Didn’t he ruffle a few feathers? After awhile wasn’t he great n’ awesome? OKAY.

What I love about these pater rich guy prompts, and Tom’s particularly, is the self-assuredness behind the fumbling prose, flailing of words and failed syntax. These nabobs all seem to think that writing words is a little thing they mastered long ago, about the same time they fobbed their times tables off on Missus Nelson.

As a very young man barely rounding the corner on 30, I had the opportunity to witness and view the Reagan revolution by serving as an enthusiastic and blindly optimistic apprentice in his administration.

Someone who’s 30, or rounding 30, or “barely rounding the corner on 30” – lyrical! – isn’t “very young”, Rimbaud. In addition to Poet’s Grippe, Tom here has two crippling ailments. One: he can’t let an adjective go without spanking its ass. The sky isn’t blue, it’s midnight blue. It’s midnight navy blue. It’s crystalline midnight azure navy blue. He’s not just bad about this, he’s recidivist redundant dead horse bad about it.

Two: he can’t finish a sentence without and and and. They sky is navy and blue. It’s azure and midnight and blue. The ether and the firmament and sky are is royal and navy and deep dark cobalt and cyan peacock indigo blue. Ugh.

Like President Reagan before him, President Trump is beginning a White House journey with a rocky and tumultuous introduction in the midst of great division, discontent and confusion among a very diverse and conflicted American and foreign constituency. I cannot help but reflect on the parallels of these two administrations as a compass for clarity and direction.

How sad inadequate and sorrowful.

However, the bureaucracy must be amended, adopted, nourished, realigned, incentivized and held accountable. If not, the machinery itself, not the people who run it, become corroded and corrupt. Without constant supervision and monitoring, the bureaucracy will both grow in size and diminish in efficacy.

Very much substandard and shoddy bollocks. Shameful and unfortunate, and honestly really no kidding.

Here’s the point Tom’s getting at, though: Donald Trump is bent on changing everything. Okay? And this is exactly what we need.

…President Trump is causing many legacy institutions to feel challenged as they scramble with the change that he is stewarding. The inertia and momentum of the government does not naturally lend itself to new methods of communication, thinking and negotiation.

Then again what’s foremost in Americans’ minds? Stability. Which is what good government is all about.

The bureaucracy is not the enemy but an essential ingredient to our success… An entrenched establishment is a safeguard, not a terminal illness.

Thankfully Donald Trump is about to change all that.

…the bureaucracy must be amended, adopted, nourished, realigned, incentivized and held accountable. If not, the machinery itself, not the people who run it, become corroded and corrupt.

But don’t worry, no one can upend the government – and why would they want to? That would be bad!

Without an unwavering entrenched establishment providing bureaucratic stability, our democratic system would cease to function in the ever-changing winds of temporal political shifts.

(…it’s not change, no. It’s the changing winds. Actually, it’s the ever-changing winds. I mean, it’s the ever-changing winds of politics. One more time, it’s the ever-changing winds of political shifts. *deep breath*..3..2..1… it’s the ever-changing winds of temporal political shifts. Waitress I’ll have the hash…)

So you see, Donald Trump has come to Washington D.C. to reform our federal government. Which thank god is forever immutable and rock steady by design, wholesome as mother’s milk. And that’s great, isn’t it? Just fantastic (…give him a chance).

Liberalism IS A METAL DISORDER and YOU ARE POOF!

Wingnuts are being driven to distraction and the rending of garments and the making of death threats by a satirical website, hillarybeattrump.org.

It’s a fake news outlet invented by an East Coast writer who (understandably) would like to remain anonymous. The site’s banner says “President Hillary Rodham Clinton”, and it features breaking updates and blog notes from a world where the electoral college never existed (tagline: News from the Real America, Where the Majority Rules).

A sampling of headlines:

• Clinton boldly invites press to attend White House press conference
• Clinton deletes email containing Russia’s shortlist of candidates for NSC director
• Climate scientists report “surging morale”

It’s getting something like 200,000 hits a day, which is a traffic torrent Instapundit could only dream of. The odd thing about the success story is who’s clicking over to read it. The web surfers making it such a huge success are right wingers.

Now, as if on cue, the furious email stream gushes any time she publishes a post that identifies Clinton as president.

“You can always find your paradise in heaven,” one reader said in an email the site’s founder shared with The Post. “Its just one bullet away.”

The writer now spends an hour a day deleting e-mails like these from her account.

“I know in your fake world she won but in the real world she did not,” another reader said. “To the people who made this Web page go get a real job like the rest of real Americans.”

“Your dad must have abused you while mom watched, right?” another reader added. “YES Liberalism IS A METAL DISORDER and YOU ARE POOF!”

“President Hillary” has recently gotten coverage from Fox News and Breitbart et. al., who greeted the fellow fake newser with snarling and derision. In WaPo, where I read about it, the author shrugged over the steady stream of promises to murder her or spit in her face.

The place is a hoot and very much tongue-in-cheek ergo a threat to the national ego – won’t you visit it? Then pack it with C-4 and lob it the other way.

What’s the other side of ‘American Woman’?

Shepard Fairey just completed a new project. It’s called We The People.

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WE THE PEOPLE art is now FREE to the public. Download it, print it, paste it, pin it to your wall, share it, and use it to come together as one. Download here and help us defend dignity, protect each other, and be greater than fear. Thanks for caring!

The posters are graphic images of colored women. Fairey is trying to push back against the misogyny and racism of Donald Trump and his supporters.

Surprise they’re already causing problems.

Teachers at Westminster High School had put up the posters, which depicted Latina, Muslim and black women and were designed by Shepard Fairey, the artist who created the “Hope” posters featuring President Barack Obama in 2008. The women are rendered in patriotic colors, with messages like “We the people are greater than fear.” The teachers put up the posters as a “show of diversity,” said Carey Gaddis, a spokeswoman for Carroll County Public Schools.

At least one staff member complained about the posters, and the teachers were “asked to take them down because they were being perceived as anti-Trump by the administration,” Gaddis said.

This is surely what Fairey was hoping for. There’s no way to look at these images and not burst out laughing out at the snowflakes who swear they’re propaganda. It’s hard to believe anyone would ask they be removed.

I see women who look like this every day.

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I’m not sure why this woman is “anti-Trump”. Is it because she’s confident? Is it because she’s Latina? Is it because anyone with brown skin is an affront to the president? If that’s the case, we’re not talking about politics any more. We’re talking about something more sinister. There’s also a flower in her hair, someone get me an expert in the semiotics of florists…

After taking the posters down, the teachers were initially allowed to put them up again. But the administration did some further investigation online and determined that the posters could be seen as political. The school does not allow teachers to put up political posters in their classrooms “unless it’s part of a curriculum and they represent both sides,” Gaddis said.

That’s just perfect. Okay Trumpers, give it your best shot. Tell me…

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…what’s the other “side” of this?

Big trouble for little men

This is a remarkable development.

Dozens of Republican members of Congress are holding tumultuous town hall meetings across the nation this week as lawmakers return home for a legislative recess many surely dreaded.

Unlike the sprawling Donald Trump administration, which I understand is a “well-oiled” machine, or Trump himself, who weekly retires to Mar-a-Lago for golf-playing and wedding-crashing, his congressional supporters have been left to face their constituents alone. And they’re looking more and more like helpless babies.

…in Georgia, only one GOP legislator hosted an event: Rep. Buddy Carter… It was rocky from the start, with many in the crowd shouting down Carter and other audience members…

At times appearing flustered by the rough reception, the two-term Savannah pharmacist was met with a sustained burst of boos and applause when he outlined his opposition to the Affordable Care Act.

The eleven other Georgia Republicans in the Senate and House ditched their voters. They knew what was coming and ran the other way. Only Carter was either courageous or fool enough to bother.

“We are trying to fix this. You have got to give us a chance. They’re proposing more competition in the marketplace,” said Carter, as scattered shouts overwhelmed some of his words. One audience member then stood up and declared: “I want what you have!”

When another Trump critic pressed him on his support for the president, Carter turned to the audience with a hint of desperation.

“I am not here to tell you Donald Trump is perfect…”

You don’t say. We see two things clearly concern the aggrieved: Trump’s presidency and the fate of Obamacare. That’s what protestors repeatedly club the GOPers with – and pity the pols, won’t you? Because neither ‘problem’ can be fixed. Donald is a chanticleer sex criminal who’s got a four year amnesty by way of the Constitution. Obamacare is an enormously complex insurance program that’s providing up to twenty million people with healthcare, in some cases saving lives.

Nonetheless Republicans openly support one and want to stab the other one in the neck. Being wildly out of touch, of course, they’ve got it all backwards.

For a little more than an hour, [Dave] Brat was heckled nonstop as he fielded questions on health care, President Trump’s policies and the border wall…

Some of the loudest jeers came over Republicans’ promise to repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act as people held up red cards signaling their discontent.

“The problem is Obamacare has just collapsed,” said Brat, who stood at a podium in the Blackstone Herb Cottage. The crowd began shouting: “No, it has not!”

Under fire, Brat resorted to his best defense: Poking fun.

Asked “Do you deny climate change?” Brat said “No, the climate changes all the time.” His apparent attempt at a joke angered the crowd, some of whom yelled, “Answer the question!”

On four separate occasions, Brat awkwardly plugged his book “American Underdog,” which details his election to Congress and his fiscal and conservative principles, saying it’s an effective sleep aid. The joke fell flat each time.

Good job, Dave. Over and over again Trump’s high-profile fans go home and get shellacked in these meetings.

Tuesday afternoon Sen. Joni Ernst sat through a 45 minute town hall meeting in Maquoketa. After taking her final question the crowd showered her with boos and chants of “Do your job.”

That’s quite understated. Watch the video and you’ll see. When Ernst has had enough and finally bails, the crowd does more than “shower” the Senator. They explode.

This is in mild-mannered Iowa for gosh sakes. Gladdens the heart, doesn’t it? Again I’m taking whatever I can get.

The big question: Does President Trump care? Has he even noticed? Donald has acknowledged as much, in his own inimitable style.

This is a little better. Previously he had called them “paid protestors.” But anyone watching the videos can see these are locals. So now he’s going with the “liberal” smear.

Donald Trump’s pal Milo

I wouldn’t pay Milo a good goddman but for one thing.

Trump knows him and likes him. Donald’s very much aware of who and what Milo is. For your own edification here’s some of Tablet Mag’s profile from June 2016:

The sad story of Milo Yiannopoulos: the Trump troll with Daddy issues

Milo Yiannopoulos is a fervent supporter of Donald Trump’s presidential campaign. Referring to Trump as “Daddy,” the ostentatiously gay British media personality provides a camp component to the presumptive Republican nominee’s fan base…

Simultaneously vacuous and sinister, equal parts nihilist and narcissist, Yiannopoulos is the model Trump advocate. And as Trump comes under increasing scrutiny, Yiannopoulos, who writes for Breitbart.com, has gone to great lengths defending the worst elements of his campaign… Among its various constituencies, the alt right is comprised of mens’ rights advocates, pseudo-intellectual “race realists,” technocratic authoritarians whose paeans to Chinese efficiency resemble those of Tom Friedman (if Tom Friedman thought Ian Smith was a sell-out), and outright neo-Nazis. Speaking of the movement’s “intellectuals,” the bulk of whom write for avowedly racist and anti-Semitic publications like VDARE and American Renaissance, Yiannopoulos and his co-author described them as “dangerously bright.”

Read the whole thing here. It’s an effective exposé.

If you’re looking for something more recent, try this:

The right-wing provocateur recalled his own sexual abuse as a teen and did not appear to outright condemn similar relationships between children and men on a 2016 episode of “The Drunken Peasants” podcast.

He flippantly said young boys “discover who they are” through such relationships, later implying that those relationships can be sexual in nature, and can “give them security and safety and provide them with love and a reliable rock where they can’t speak to their parents.”

A host with the popular podcast fired back at Yiannopoulos and said, “Sounds like Catholic priest molestation to me.”

Milo has some weird fetish about sex crime being something that happens only with little kids. Of child molestation, pederasty and pedophilia, he’s artfully chosen the last term to hide behind because it meets the definition only when you’re assaulting pre-pubescents.

“I’m grateful for Father Michael,” he said. “I wouldn’t give nearly such good [oral sex] if it wasn’t for him.” When pressed, he argued that his interviewers were blurring the meaning of “pedophilia,” misapplying it to consensual sex between post-pubescent men, even if one partner was below the age of consent.

“Pedophilia is not a sexual attraction to somebody 13 years old, who is sexually mature,” he said. “Pedophilia is attraction to children who have not reached puberty. Pedophilia is attraction to people who don’t have functioning sex organs yet who have not gone through puberty.”

When I was 13 years old I was in seventh grade. I was not “a post-pubescent man”. I was an older boy with a body going through big changes. Sexual adulthood takes a while, you know? I don’t really think I need to point this out. Nor do I have to go on about the brain being critically involved in determining sexual maturity, as well as orientation. There are good reasons to consider 13 year-olds off limits for the purposes of horny adults. [I could certainly go on at some length about Donald Trump’s own fetish for assaulting young women and gawking at naked teens: “Don’t worry, ladies. I’ve seen it all before.” Another time, creep.]

But of course we’re talking about the execrable Trumpiste Milo, who is now trying to shoehorn into kewl-kids-behavior his vomit inducing opinions.

“I did say that there are relationships between younger men and older men that can help a young gay man escape from a lack of support or understanding at home. That’s perfectly true and every gay man knows it. But I was not talking about anything illegal and I was not referring to pre-pubescent boys.”

It is illegal in all 50 states, and in all the civilized world as far as I know, to have sex with 13 year-old boys. For very good reasons you twisted shit.

This is Narcissism? It would do this? Yes, of course.

This shit used to be funny.

The “Bowling Green massacre” is a nonexistent incident referred to by U.S. Counselor to the President Kellyanne Conway in interviews with Cosmopolitan and TMZ on January 29, 2017, and in an interview on the MSNBC news program Hardball with Chris Matthews on February 2, 2017…

The phrase became the top trending topic on Twitter, with many of the tweets parodying the statement. A website was set up anonymously for the purpose of collecting donations for victims of the imaginary massacre. Facebook users used the site’s safety check feature to pretend the event was real. Additionally, vigils were held in Kentucky and New York to commemorate the nonexistent massacre.

No more.

The Swedish Embassy in Washington has reportedly contacted the State Department asking for clarification on President Trump’s comments suggesting an incident had occurred Friday night in Sweden…

[Donald Trump] specifically referred to what happened “last night” in Sweden.

“When you look at what’s happening in Germany, when you look at what’s happening last night in Sweden — Sweden!” he said during the rally. “Who would believe this? Sweden! They took in large numbers, they’re having problems like they never thought possible.”

As I’ve said all along Trump is mentally ill, just like my father. It’s Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I’ll clarify later but I’m starving. I want to eat first.

As Revelations goes, perhaps this is Mister Right

As stupid incompetent and fuckall as President Trump is, we can be thankful for a few things.

He hasn’t yet set light to Fort McHenry’s arsenal. He hasn’t stubbed his toe on Malmstrom’s itchy nukes. He hasn’t gone Bay of Pigs on Portland. He hasn’t called a trans-polar airstrike on Chris Hayes.

There are so many personality chinks to be wary of. It’s not clear exactly where and when he’ll go Commander Guy. He will of course, but it hasn’t happened yet. It’s early enough we can still take some pleasure in Armageddon being weeks away.

It’s not much to be glad about, I’m only taking what I can get. This however makes my blood run cold.

Senior White House officials and members of the National Security Council are pushing former United Nations Ambassador John Bolton as a replacement for ousted national security adviser Michael Flynn, according to multiple sources in and out of the White House who spoke to the Washington Free Beacon.

It’s the Free Bacon I know. But Bolton has gadflied every administration official and presidential pretender for 20 years. He’s as ambitious and greedy as a person can get. He’s as bloody and violent as a person can get. I have no doubt he’s got every bar buddy and evangelical phone tree flunky calling the White House.

Bolton will not be denied his place in history. He must start a war with Iran.

To Stop Iran’s Bomb, Bomb Iran
By JOHN R. BOLTON MARCH 26, 2015

…This gold standard is now everywhere in jeopardy because the president’s policy is empowering Iran. Whether diplomacy and sanctions would ever have worked against the hard-liners running Iran is unlikely… The inconvenient truth is that only military action like Israel’s 1981 attack on Saddam Hussein’s Osirak reactor in Iraq or its 2007 destruction of a Syrian reactor, designed and built by North Korea, can accomplish what is required. Time is terribly short, but a strike can still succeed.

He’s been flogging this bombshell for years.

Pray everybody. Because if the Bacon is right, we’re in shit.

The selection of Bolton as the next national security adviser would empower Flynn’s allies still in the White House and send a message that his national security vision is represented within the Trump administration. Bolton is also favored by White House staffers who are opposed to the selection of any candidate who criticized President Trump during the 2016 campaign.

Bolton is so maniacal and manipulative he’ll have Trump on his ass in a few months. We’ll be in Iran before 2019 for sure.

Seems to be some sort of ‘Russia’ connection in all this

This is how WaPo opens up the dramatic short-story of the rise and fall of Trump’s first NSA director:

Michael Flynn was at a beachside resort in the Dominican Republic, a stretch of sand and sun that he and his wife had visited for years, when he took a few moments out of their post-election vacation for a call with the Russian ambassador to the United States.

As a veteran intelligence officer, Flynn must have known that a call with a Russian official in Washington would be intercepted by the U.S. government, pored over by FBI analysts and possibly even shared with the White House.

Flynn had to know the intelligence services would be tracking high level Russian communications within the U.S.. So why did he persist with the contacts? Why did he have so many of these conversations? And why did he then lie about them? These are fair questions. At the very least we can conclude that Flynn was stupid.

But don’t let that distract you from a second (maybe better) narrative now emerging from an unexpected place. It is entirely possible, friends, that the poor general is actually a victim. Of a kind of plot. Something apparently sinister humminah targeting him bleargh phone calls harumph.

“That’s nine leakers that all belong in jail,” [Devin] Nunes said. “Those nine people broke the law, clearly, by leaking classified information to anybody.”…

Nunes said he also wanted to know how U.S. intelligence agencies were wiretapping Flynn’s calls, which he said may also have been illegal.

So Nunes said. And where exactly does this Flynn defender come from? The House Intelligence Committee, he’s the chairman.

The chairman said there are only two ways that intelligence agencies can listen in on an American’s phone call — after obtaining a warrant, or inadvertently, such as in the case of Flynn speaking with a foreign official being spied on, which the report suggests was the case.

Nunes said “it’s pretty clear” that there was no warrant.

“It’s pretty clear that’s not the case,” he said. “I’m pretty sure the FBI didn’t have a warrant on Michael Flynn … To listen to an American’s phone call you would have to go to a court, there’d be all that paperwork there. So I’m guessing that doesn’t exist.”

It’s pretty clear there wasn’t a warrant. Unless there was, because there certainly could have been. Maybe though – this is complicated, I know, but stay with me here – the recording could have happened inadvertently. Like when intelligence agents are listening to a foreign operative. But hey what could that possibly have to do with Michael Flynn? He was only calling the Russian ambassador five times a day, like Lisa Simpson on the Corey Hotline. ‘Tis a puzzlement.

If it seems like we’re through the looking glass here, it’s because we are. All of us who lived through the Cold War are right now banging our heads against the desk.

A Wall Street Journal editorial on Tuesday also questioned whether spies listening to Flynn broke the law.

“…they are supposed to protect the identity and speech of innocent Americans. Yet the Washington Post, which broke the story, says it spoke to multiple U.S. officials claiming to know what Mr. Flynn said on that call,” the Journal said.

“The questions someone in the White House should ask the National Security Agency is why it didn’t use minimization procedures to protect Mr. Flynn?”

WHY DIDN’T THEY PROTECT MR. FLYNN? That’s a good question. Hell, what about that poor Russian ambassador? Why won’t anybody protect him? The CIA are all over the poor guy like white on rice.

Now would probably be a good time to throw in a few links to breaking stories:

Trump Campaign Aides Had Repeated Contacts With Russian Intelligence
Russian Media And The American Alt-Right Movement Converge On Messaging Over Gen. Mike Flynn’s Resignation
Russia Deploys Missile, Violating Treaty and Challenging Trump
Russia sends spy ship near US coast, deploys banned missiles at home, officials say
Russian jets buzz US destroyer in Black Sea

This would also probably be a good time to remind ourselves how much Donald detests intrusions of government, hi-tech espionage, stark hypocrisy…

Eh, hello Mojo, this is Michael Flynn…

We know there are quite a few people in this administration who are not well-suited to their jobs. Chief of Staff Reince Priebus for one is a complete incompetent, which makes him a poor fit for anything outside running the GOP into a lake.

The NSA chief, Michael Flynn, had himself a pretty good military career. But the Army’s an arcane outfit with mysterious requirements for competency and excellence, and from which all sorts of odd birds do hail (Allen West, for instance).

We know that Flynn was ousted from the directorship of the Defense Intelligence Agency under the Obama administration back in 2014.

In a private e-mail that was leaked online, Colin Powell said that he had heard in the DIA (apparently from later DIA director Vincent R. Stewart) that Flynn got fired because he was “Abusive with staff, didn’t listen, worked against policy, bad management, etc.” According to The New York Times, Flynn exhibited a loose relationship with facts, leading his subordinates to refer to Flynn’s repeated dubious assertions as “Flynn facts”.

Whether this makes him more or less fit to serve in a Trump administration is anybody’s guess. That he’s a wild-eyed Muslimphobe and Trumper – and something of a Muscovite – makes it almost fait accompli he ended up as Donald’s NSA chief.

But apparently he lied to everybody – even the Vice President – about his contacts with senior members of the Russian government. That doesn’t exactly bolster confidence in him.

Flynn spoke with Pence at least twice Friday, according to another White House official who declined to say whether the conversations were about the ongoing controversy. The episode over sanctions against Russia has opened a rift between Flynn and Pence, who exchanged a chilly handshake Friday before Trump’s news conference with Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe.

Flynn also apologized to Pence and a source says the two “smoothed things over.”

Everything’s okay? Oh alright. Just fine.

Kellyanne Conway, the counselor to the President, told reporters that Trump has “full confidence” in Flynn.

“Gen. Flynn does enjoy the full confidence of the President,” Conway said on MSNBC.

Right, if you say so. No reason to think the Director’s in any trouble. I mean, you would know…

Embattled White House national security adviser Michael Flynn resigned Monday night, an abrupt end to a brief tenure.

What? No!

“I have sincerely apologized to the President and the Vice President, and they have accepted my apology,” Flynn wrote, according to a copy of his resignation letter obtained by CNN…

“I know with the strong leadership of President Donald J. Trump and Vice President Mike Pence and the superb team they are assembling, this team will go down in history as one of the greatest presidencies in US history.”

Call it ‘My 24 Days At The NSA’. Look for the embittered tell-all to come out on the Breitbart imprint, in about, oh, Friday.